Joe i changed my blogskin!









i will be moving into hostel again next year. So excited. Sylvia, my TP senior is moving out and i'm taking her place. my room mate will be Yvonne. Staying in Hall 10, Blk 51, level 3. Jun Wen stays on level 6 in the same building. :) :)







29/11/08



Happy 6th mth anniversary to jun wen and me! OMG, 6 mths passed so fast!



Simba,



Thanks for appreciating all my silly jokes. U said only u will laugh at my jokes. But no hor, ying said she miss me and my jokes few days ago. haha. Thanks for being simple and easily happy. u r one of the nicest guy i've ever met. And what's most thrilling is u r my bf. U have a small body but a big heart! I think the biggest organ in your body is your heart, not your skin. No quarrels, no disagreements, only fun and laughter. i will always scold u for making my stomach hurt from the laughter. Thanks simba, u rock big time!










i went to a musical today. Priscilla is performing and Biondi, younger bro and i went to give our support. She appeared on stage at the last part of the musical. She sang a song "Good Night'. She sang beautifully. She is only 15 and she is such a talent!










The musical was about dreams. Don just dream dreams, do dreams. Dreams are meant to be fulfilled. I am not a chim girl so i often fell asleep during musicals. I just cant understand them. But this time becos it was made so singaporean, i understood and enjoyed it.









Then in the feedback form..


What do u think about the musical?
It was fantastic! Yes, dreams are meant to be fulfilled!


What do u particularly like about the musical?
The last part: Singing of 'Good Night'.



Rate the overall performance:
Great!


Will u invite your friends to come?
Yes!


Dunno why i so high sia..





Later Priscilla told us that the director read to them all the feedback forms and 5 people said they liked her singing. She was so sure 3 of them must be me, younger bro n Biondi. haha.






i realise i have no dreams!











That day Sharon asked me, "What are u gd at?'
I thought very hard for a moment and asked, "Erms.. i dunno lei.. IS talking nonsense considered?"
Then Xiang got a shock of his life and told jun wen secretly, "u've got special taste!" LOLS







It was Thanksgiving on thurs. I mass send some friends an sms about thanksgiving. Sharon said some friends have already send her the msg, but i am the only one she replied. So happy, gonna hao lian to jun wen later.







She also said a couple of things that make me very very happy. I think i cant sleep for the next ten days. Or i will smile myself to sleep. Thanks Sharon. For this thanksgiving, i wanna thank you for being my cooked friend. Thank you for being part of my life. Without u, uni life may not be as interesting. U made me smile everyday in school. And i like to talk to u so much!












i have copied 6 discs of photos from jun wen's ShangHai trip. Here are some.. Will upload some more soon!

They said shorter guys are more well liked by girls. Quite true! My younger bro, jason and jun wen are examples. Haha.

A hair pin on simba's head. SO cute! Poor simba. Tink he got bullied by the girls again. Sometimes i do think he look like a girl. Oops!

27th nov -




Finally 6 papers are over. Exams are over. I was so embarrassed today! I just cant wait to go toilet after my last paper. But the invigilator said i cant go until they finished counting the papers.








And my face was turning pink. I cant wait till we are dismissed.







And i got an idea.




I awkardly turned to Patrick, my coursemate sitting beside me, pointed to my pencil case, calculator, wallet and hp, and asked very timidly, "erms.. sorry.. Can u help me pass these to jun wen? i need to rush to the toilet after this.."










i wasnt very close to him u see... He gave me a stunning look. Then in the process of passing my belongings, si ying and jasmine tried to kapo my wallet n hp! i had a hard time persuading them tt i am a penniless poor child. haha.










When they reached jun wen's hands, he turned back 45 degrees clockwise from his seat and laughed at me from a distance. His look gave me sth like "Is there a need to be so urgent?!"











I was so lucky. Luckily his surname is 'Tan', not 'Ang' or 'Chan'. And he sits near me. HAHA. (My surname is 'Toh' in case u dunno)













And his hands were too small to bring both pencil cases, two wallets, two hps, two calculators and two exam question papers back to our bags. So he left some on his table and went back to take more the 2nd round.. while i was in the toilet.











And he left his matric card in the exam hall. Oh oh.. he only discovered it when we almost reached JP. The mini guy do have some nice friends! One of his drove back to sch to take it for him.









We both just cant wait to get out of school. Had free coffee at starbucks and watched Madagascar 2.




He was quite tired and he sent me home by 9pm. I finally took my laptop and went to the living room to watch 'xiao liang re' with my parents. Feel so so great!





This time, i studied. i studied much more than i expected. i understood more concepts than the previous 2 study weeks. Although i still couldn't do plenty of exam questions, i felt more satisfaction. Haha.








I went to study with jun wen everyday. Found out tt the best place to study is school. We explored many different places to study. Library.. lounge.. reading room.. study room..










Library is too cold and chairs are hard. We are like insects, no backbone! And our butts hurt after an hr. So we started to love the lounge! Sofa seats! But it is simply too noisy. Then we discovered the reading room. Peace and quiet. And most importantly, sofa seats! And hot coffee machine outside the room!










Because my English was quite bad, i couldn't understand many sentences in the textbook. Jun Wen has to explain them in Chinese for me. Wat's amazing is he could do a sum twice as fast as me and get them all correct. And me? Erms.. i made mistakesall the time and copied his answers. Then learnt from them. i was lazy to redo them. And he could memorise all the bio stuff and never forgets. OMG!!!!!!! HOW COME i've got a smart bf!








i can really admit tt i am so hardworking. Never been so hardworking b4. HAHA. HAOLIAN!






I dunno whether it's me or it's canteen A food. Why do i have diahorrea all the time? I couldnt vomit them out. And i became quite sick.. For days.. many many days. And became sad..Sadder.. Saddest.. One of my greatest fears in life is to be sick if u know me.






But..
BUT..




I was overwhelmed by the amt of msgs i received. "Are u ok?" "u will get well.." etc etc.
And was smiling. i have many friends who care. :) And of cos a bf who is happy everyday (even though he had diahorrea too).










Felicia dropped me a letter in my letterbox. i cried upon reading it.
Despite how tired and busy she was with her attachment, her efforts really touched me.
She told me before.. It is a situation that leads us to more situations which will change our lives and make us stronger and better people.








'No one can go back & make a new start. Anyone can start from now & make a brand new ending. God didn't promise days without pain, lauther without sorrow, sun without rain. But God did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears & light for the way.






Disappointments are like road humps. They slow you down a bit but you enjoy the smooth road afterwards. Dont stay on the humps for too long. Move on.








When you feel down becos you didnt get what u want, just sit tight & be happy. Becos God is thinking of something better to give you. When something happens to you, good or bad, consider what it means. There's a purpose to life's events, to teach you how to laugh more or not to cry too hard.'





This really encourages me alot. Yes felicia, there's a purpose to life's events, to teach you how to laugh more or not to cry too hard.










My uncle's suicide has affected me to some extent i guess. That day he jumped off the building, Daddy, younger bro and i went to his house. I saw how depressed my aunt was. She became mentally unstable and i was pretty scared.










Although i wasn't close to my uncle, i am close to my aunt and my cousin. Seeing the state my aunt is in really broke my heart. I was with them throughout the funeral and lost count of how many times i cried a day.








This was the 1st time i saw my aunts and uncles cried. I guessed becos it was the 1st time their eldest sister appeared weak to them. She screams and lost control of herself. i felt so helpless. I didnt know wat to say or wat to do. i hope my presence was 1 of the reasons they felt comforted.













That night, i slept late. My cousin was really tired and i promised her to watch over her mum. Few times she woke up and asked me whether her mum was still sleeping in her room. i guessed she was imagining things.











I saw how strong my cousin was. She oversee all the funeral arrangements with my uncles. Luckily aunt still have her. i went to stay with them for a week plus. And enjoyed my stay. My cousin didnt dare to sleep alone at night. My aunt still needs sleeping pills. i'm so glad tt their moods became better. Cousin said she would look forward.. And thank God.










Uncle chose to commit suicide becos he was sick. He didnt get well after 2 mths of seeing the doctor. Maybe he was afraid of putting the family to financial crisis. Or maybe the pain in his body was too much for him to bear.










It's been a mth. And i hope they are better now.
:)

18th Nov~

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY TING! :)

I'm so glad to have known u in this life! U've been a great great great friend to me. May all your wishes come true! Although i may not be able to see u as often as last time, but just want to let u know that u will always be in my heart. All the best girl!

20th nov ~

My two tuition kids got back their PSLE results.

One got 217. 3 As and 1B. Called me up excitedly to tell me. She was like, "i thought i will get below 200. i really didnt expect that." Her mum was very very happy. i'm happy too.

The other, cute angeline, got 162. 3Cs and 1B. Her mum was very troubled. Cos she cant find a nearby sch for her daughter for Normal Academic stream...... oh oh ...

21st nov~

Today.. i was quite down..

On my way home, i didnt know why i feel the need to look at my phone's drafts messages. And i found this:





10 things i like abt myself:


1. i am happy.
2. i am positive.
3. i can relate well to others.
4. i laugh alot and i have the loudest laughter.
5. i can work hard in my studies.
6. i can bless others with all i have.
7. i am talkative.
8. i am a good listener.
9. i love myself.
10. i smile.






And ya i smile right at the moment i saw i have written.






this was in my phone drafts cos i wanted to mass send my church friends about it late in the night few mths ago i guess. It was too late that night so i didnt want to disturb them. Then i forgot abt it the next day.





i still remb my younger bro tell me.. One of the ten things was he is very handsome. OMG!












Then i decided to tell jun wen. i sms him.






and he replied.. "u been hiding ur troubles huh y i m ur soulmate i always listen......... poor/rich sick/healthy i will stick by u............. It tks more than courage to face it but wat matters is how u tk things in stride. i admire u for being such a brave girl.... Just smile along as days go by, i will always be by your side........"










Mummy kept coming into my room to say 'don cry don cry, tml no sch sleep early. Small thing u also cry, ah yo!!'







and i was still in my room when felicia called me. She is very very happy. Told me how happy she was today. So cute. haha. I have been kind of affected by her. So became happier too.








Then lastly of cos my younger bro came into my room and told me about his attachment. How funny his colleagues were.







Well.. when u feel sad.. it's not the end of the world after all!




:)

Will be busy with sch and exams. Meanwhile.. i uploaded some pics!

Pls visit maggie's blog:



http://www.melodiies.blogspot.com/












Nice photos huh.. Nice clothes too! Visit for great shopping. The model is my fren, Charlene!

And i bought from Kexin cards for children's day.


It was stickers and cards. I decorated it myself. :)


I gave one to jun wen and wish him Happy Children's Day!

Nice right?!

-------------------------------------------------

My bro's bday in church.. He was asked to answer 15 questions. If he didnt get each right, they would draw on his face.

The next osama.. Haha. They drew his brows... his cheeks..

And also his chin.. He has got beard.
Dont be mistaken.. We didnt bully him till he cried. He was very touched that we cried. As emo as me. HAha.

We also went Seoul Garden to celebrate his bdae. Biondi, Elaine, Jia Yun, Maggie and me. The pastamania peeps!

Maggie and Biondi

Jia Yun and maggie

And i took some photos from Elaine's food album.. i got her consent of cos, Dont sue me ah. Sooooo attractive food!

She did them all by herself. Can u believe it? A 18 year old girl can cook, make cookies and desserts. I'm so impressed.

I really really like this...

And this! Chocolates! And i kept persuading her to make them for us to try next time.

Maggie

Maggie!!

Maggie trying to propose to jia yun. And jia yun pretending to feel touched..

-------------------------------------------------

And i saw this on jun wen's house kitchen wall..

We were trying to do our lab assignment when his mum ramdomly asked us to take a photo together. haha.

(His dad bought him a new bicycle on his bdae)

And i took pains to persuade jun wen to let me take a photo of him..

With a cap..

And with a pair of nerd glasses! so retro!

i'm still not sure what lies ahead of me. All i know now is to trust. Trust myself, trust my decisions. I'm still taking one step at a time. I hope one day when i have to make a stand, i will make the right choice.









Meanwhile.. I want to have high hopes. Hoping that i wont be forced to do what i can't bear to do. Hoping that i don't have to live in fear. Hoping for acceptance into people's lives.